ninjay | week 1, sunday

[Light has kept relatively to himself after the execution. Quiet, a look of distance on his features, an unwillingness to talk to anyone directly just yet. It had been, of course, disturbing in its own way -- he knows this from a strictly empirical standpoint, just as he knows that it was wrong to have killed Hana in such a tortuous manner. It was unfair and it was unfortunate.

But empathy is something that he seems to have lost a while ago. He isn't sorry for what he did, because if he hadn't, he would have been punished, likely with death. Simple as that. His survival was more important, and if she had to die, then at least he would be putting an end to her pain. He was doing in her a favor in that.

If anything, he's irritated that the spotlight had been cast on him in such a way. He's seated in a chair in the lounge, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. He looks up at Jay as he walks in and brings up the execution. Because of course he does.]

...I've been feeling as if I'm going to be sick all morning.

[ he doesn't answer right away, instead focusing on studying light. jay could have had been more tactful, maybe approached the topic with a little more gentle care. jay has already shown that he's not the best with handling someone who's deeply upset, considering how much he started floundering when he made hana cry at the trial?? @god please make him never have to deal with that again.

so. he probably should say something comforting. ]

I don't blame you. [ he remembers mira telling him that she didn't understand why hana might feel sick during the trial. ] What do you think went wrong?

[ he figures not asking about the execution, for now, is the safest bet. ]

[What went wrong? The question threatens to bring up frustration within him, and he frowns. He moves his hand away from his face and settles it on the armrest, fingers flexing against the upholstery.

There's a lot that went wrong. Conclusions that might have been made without proper consideration, because they were in a time crunch. And because evidence and clues were being presented to them very quickly, with little time to observe how they might actually work -- the menu, for one. So many variables, and while logic was enough to see them through to the correct conclusion, how were they to know who the actual killer was?]

What went wrong was us not knowing all the rules to this twisted game. [He's referring to the Ghost.] And yet we're still forced to play it.

[But he straightens, attempting to give Jay a less ambiguous answer. He doesn't look at him directly.] We were right-- Hana was the one to have physically done the act of killing. From logic alone, we concluded that. But the rest? It appears that some of these... "roles" operate in a way that isn't immediately clear.

We should have asked her more questions. We should have tried more to differentiate someone who was possessed, versus someone who wasn't.

The problem with that last thing is the fact that the Ghost was the very first killer. We had absolutely nothing to compare it to and no clue what to look for. Her testimony simply just made no sense compared to everyone else's, but not in a way that stood out for role reasons.

[ all she said was that she slept through everything. hana mentioned that was unusual for her since she typically gets up during the night, but the only people who could have probably confirmed that were her roommates. which... they probably should have asked them to do, now that he thinks about it.

goddammit. ]

[It's easy enough to think about what they should have done in retrospect. Hindsight is always 20/20, something that Light hates to apply to himself, because he shouldn't have to? He should be able to see clearly in the moment, despite the pressure and chaos. How utterly irritating.

A long exhale.]

I know there's nothing to compare to. However, we do know that Hana acted while under possession of the Ghost. We can treat this as way to reverse-engineer the problem; in the future, we can compare the next individuals placed under suspicion to Hana's story. Maybe then something will stand out.

[He runs a hand through his hair in consternation.] I just...

I feel guilty.

[No, he doesn't. He feels frustrated, irritated. But it's displeasure all the same, easy enough to school onto his face.]

Well, you did kill someone.

[ he leans against a nearby table. the look on jay's face is... sympathetic, almost, but mostly just tired. ]

It's not an easy burden to carry with you. We all killed her, really, but you're the one who had to actually physically do so. I assume people voted for you because of what's on your card, which is more than a little heartless considering you've told us that you weren't actually guilty. Now they made it true. Sorry about that.

[He's quiet for a moment. Again, how everything circles back to that one word on his card -- he wonders how things would be different, if it wasn't there. What position would he be in now, less burdened with the prospect of suspicion and obligation to always defend himself?

Not so much tiring as it is annoying.]

Did you vote for me? [Blunt, but lacking any real accusation.]

No. I was hoping someone would volunteer to do it so we could avoid having someone get the job handed to them with no warning or time to mentally prepare.

[ so, you know, like what ended up happening. ]

It was already bad enough that we got the wrong person, but that just seemed like too much on top of it. I didn't vote at all.

I don't think there's anyone here who would've willingly volunteered to execute someone so early. Even if it was out of "good' intentions, hoping to make it a quick and painless death-- [Something that would have been futile, anyway] --then that person would still look suspicious. Too eager.

[His fingers rap on the arm of the chair, idly.]

No one wants suspicion cast over them for no real reason.

[YOU KNOW, KIND OF LIKE HIM AND HIS PROFILE CARD except they'd be right where Light is concerned, but. Whatever.]

Do you think people will be keeping quiet about their roles for as long as possible? I've been thinking about it, and in some instances it doesn't make sense to do so.

That's true. Eventually people will have to start volunteering though, especially since they give you a selection to choose from. If someone who's older is grouped with a lot of the younger people here for an executioner vote, wouldn't it look bad for them if they didn't offer themselves to do it?

[ if anything you'd look like a major asshole if you let the ten-year-old execute someone instead of volunteering yourself. that kind of reputation would probably hurt you if you're ever a suspect in the future. ]

You're right about the roles. There are definitely some where it'll be best if you never reveal yourself [ LIKE THE, YOU KNOW, GHOST jfc ] but for others... Going through the menu, there are definitely roles that seem pretty straightforward and that you wouldn't be in too much danger if you gave it away. You'll gain others' trust more easily if you tell them what your role is. You still have to be smart about who you give the information to though.

It might look bad. But some people care less about looking like a coward than what's good for the overall group. It's just human nature.

[And that's just Light's cynicism eking out. He reels it back in.]

Yes, I was thinking that it's an easy way to prove yourself innocent, and thus narrow down the suspect list. After all, if you know the murder weapon was A, and your role was weapon B, then by declaring your role you would be freed from immediate suspicion.

[A beat.] It would also help us avoid sending the wrong person to their death, again.

The only problem with that is, it'll become somewhat easier to frame you for murder after if your weapon type leaves wounds that can be easily replicated after.

[ so he really hopes people won't do it recklessly. part of it is concerned for his safety, but mostly jay just hates watching people do stupid shit because he has a generally low tolerance for idiocy. ]

But that's a risk they'll just have to take.

Of course. That's why timing is critical. That, and you'd have to consider if someone would be dumb enough to use their assigned weapon to kill anyone, especially after they've already announced what their role is.

[Light is the same way, but in this case, he probably cares even less than Jay when it comes to how stupid want to be. In the end, stupid decisions made unravelling this game even easier. Please make all the dumb decisions, everyone, so he can catch murderers and condemn you all to death.]

Would you consider outing yourself? [Not now, obviously, but he means in the future.] Would the risks be worth it to you?

If there comes a time where the pros outweigh the cons in regards to revealing myself, I would. Ideally, it wouldn't be to everyone though.

[ he's considered that, in order to make possible alliances to work, there will be cases where you'll probably have to tell each other your role if it's viable. ]

Anything can happen in the future, however. There may come a time where you won't have any choice but to do it.

[If possible alliances were to work, then revealing one's role would be a sign of trust. It made sense from a logical standpoint, but -- well, Light doesn't trust anyone quite that easily, and with that critical kind of information.

Time would tell.]

To prove one's innocence? Yes. If I were to be honest, if it meant escaping an execution, I would be hesitant, but... I think I would reveal my role in that situation.

[Survival was key, first and foremost.]

If it's the only thing saving you from being executed, then I think most people would do it.

[ well. ]

... Except for the Ghost, maybe. I don't think they're anyone's favorite person at the moment.

[His eyes narrow just a bit at the mention of the Ghost, obviously displeased. It's not surprising -- most everyone would react in the same way.]

They'll have to be particularly vigilant if they want to get away with it again. If they're caught, they're going to feel the wrath of this entire group -- how that culminates, we'll see.

[But really, the both of them know how that'll go. The Ghost, when outed, probably doesn't have long for this world.]

I was talking to someone a few days ago, and I brought up the fact that sooner or later we'll probably start having a few murders motivated by revenge. They hadn't even considered that to be a possibility, it was... an interesting reaction.

[ even with the ghost, there's a possibility that someone might discover their identity before the trial and take matters into their own hands. ]

Really?

[Light looks appropriately skeptical at that.]

And here I thought it would be obvious that this might be a motivation down the line. "Vigilante justice" and all that.

They were shocked by the revelation. But I'm sure with something like that being your reason, it'll become a lot easier to kill someone. You're doing it for "good reasons," after all.

I don't plan on going out of my way to actually kill someone. [A quick correction to that! Light doesn't act rashly, especially not without ample consideration.]

I'm just saying it wouldn't be surprising if someone else did adhere to this mindset. That, compiled with all the other stressors they've been putting us through, just means someone's willpower is going to crack sooner or later.

I meant the general you, but thank you for the clarification.

[ jay can't blame light for wanting to correct people considering he's on the same boat, but he still finds it a little funny. i'm sorry. ]

Especially those who aren't used to being under this particular type of pressure.

week 1, sunday

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